You can see the on-site version of this update here (recommended).
General
Hi friends,
It's been quite a while – for a couple reasons.
First, I spent most of 2024 building several new major pillars for the Guide which are still not ready for publication. To give a sense of it, one of these is a single page currently sitting at over fifteen thousand words, and I'm wanting to publish it and a handful of others all at once. However, even unpublished, those pages have precipitated lots of structural changes and clarifications on top of the usual new additions and improvements, and there's more than enough to share now.
I also just wanted to say hi.
Secondly, 2024 also brought multiple waves of severe burnout. A long list of life stressors combined with the possibility (likelihood) that I’m on the autistic spectrum (guess what's getting added to the Guide in the not-too-distant future) has forced me to confront how rigidly self-reliant I've been. I've had to reduce my work hours, drop projects, do less, and say 'no' more. It's been...instructive, to put it mildly.
My current living conditions deplete me more than they restore me. That combined with multi-layered neurodivergence and being highly sensitive has made it difficult to do my best work, or show up in the world and for my people in the ways that I want to, or even take care of myself in the ways I need to. It began a vicious cycle: if I can't do my best work, it's hard to improve my living conditions; if I can't improve my living conditions, it's hard to do my best work.
I've spent the last year trying to find some okayness with the way things are, but it's mostly looked like tolerating and coping with circumstances that aren't sustainable.
I need a space I can make my own and feel at home in.
I need a car.
I need therapeutic support.
I have none of these things.
Several of my basic needs are going unmet, in large part because I’ve been trying to do way too much by myself and haven't asked for help breaking this cycle.
I need your help.
The Integral Guide (last I checked!) has a sizable readership. If everyone who reads the Guide were to donate even $1 per month, it would be self-sustaining overnight. I can’t tell you how many hundreds of hours I’ve put into it. Much of the time I spend not trying to make ends meet or doing life things, I spend on the Guide. I'd like to continue – and to keep it free for everyone.
If the Guide has helped you or someone you know, or if you see its value, please consider ❤️ Supporting My Work. Even small contributions make a big difference. With enough support, I can sustain and expand the Guide without burning myself out — when I have more, I can give more.
Thank You
Thank you to Carolina Moscoso, collectivematter, Felissa Rubin, Lucinda, Kelly Wright, Sarah McGowan, StarSon, Tess Paula, Lisa, Jin Yu, Rachel Murphy, Simon Ha, Marguerite, Megan Clapp, Saskia van Oosten, Shawn Saylor, Stanislas Nanchen and 4 anonymous folks for ❤️ Donating.
Thank you Cheyenne Ray, Valerie Brezina Webb, collectivematter, Solongo, and 2 anonymous persons for buying something from my wishlist.
Words cannot express how appreciative I am.
Changes
Roughly 500 pages are impacted by this update.
🕯️ Boundaries (Updated)
🕯️ Resourcing (Updated)
🕯️ Authenticity (New)
☀️ Compassion (Updated)
⭐️ Self-Care (Updated)
⭐️ Rest and Restoration (Updated)
🔑 Go at your pace (Updated)
💡 Window of Tolerance (Updated)
💡 Emotional Regulation (Updated)
🕯️ Self-Regulation (Updated)
🛠 Self-Soothing (Updated)
⭐️ Co-Regulation (Updated)
🛠 Pendulation Toolkit (Updated, formerly Protector Toolkit)
🛡️ Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) (Updated)
💡 Burnout (New)
🕯️ Journaling (Updated)
🔑 Try not to make decisions or problem-solve from a place of fear (New)
🔑 We need both Theory and Practice (Updated)
🧘 Loving-Kindness (Metta) Meditation (Updated)
🕯️ Dropping Hot Coals (New)
🛠️ One Point Better (New)
🦮 How to Recover from Trauma (Updated)
💡 Guilt (Updated)
<3
Levi - I can relate to so much of your post. As we learn to recognize our hyper-independence, it's hard. To be vulnerable, and connect with others is such a huge step.... I've been extremely challenged in asking for help or even recognizing how I'm doing. You're in my thoughts and I hope you'll be able to meet your goals for housing somewhere that can add to your healing, not make it harder. This part so hard.
Hang on there. I can relate. I am actually diagnosed autistic myself and my current place is literally painfully killing me, has been doing that for a number of years... The environment for autistic people here in Toronto is brutal, finding a reasonable place and surviving is increasingly harder and harder, all public parks around are just overcrowded tent cities for the homeless now, as the housing crisis is brutal squared. Due to stress, I got the right part of my face temporarily paralyzed an hour ago, I am so glad that it slowly melts, hurts a bit, but I am optimistic that I'll get back in control of it in a day or two. Two days ago, my nose started bleeding with headaches. So yes, I know well what you are talking about. We have no choice, but to believe in a better future, in survival, however pointless thatight seem, giving up is simply not an option. I wish you the best of luck, brother.