I've been wondering how you've been Levi! Much of what you shared for your 2024 resonates for me, and it's still going. I'm tired, and I'm burnout. Yet, I keep pushing and punishing myself, getting no where good (or so it feels). A lot of stuff sucks, but a lot of stuff is good, and might become good soon. I'm hopeful for the future too. Good to hear from you.
PS. Just opened your Burnout note. I've been talking about David Graeber's Bullshit Jobs lately to so many people! I kinda feel like Burnout is like the ego being like "screw this, I'm done".
Levi - I can relate to so much of your post. As we learn to recognize our hyper-independence, it's hard. To be vulnerable, and connect with others is such a huge step.... I've been extremely challenged in asking for help or even recognizing how I'm doing. You're in my thoughts and I hope you'll be able to meet your goals for housing somewhere that can add to your healing, not make it harder. This part so hard.
Thank you, Lauren! It is such a challenge living in a culture of I've-got-my-shit-togetherism when the reality is most people are isolated and struggling. Just trying to drop some more of that, a few bits at a time.
Hang on there. I can relate. I am actually diagnosed autistic myself and my current place is literally painfully killing me, has been doing that for a number of years... The environment for autistic people here in Toronto is brutal, finding a reasonable place and surviving is increasingly harder and harder, all public parks around are just overcrowded tent cities for the homeless now, as the housing crisis is brutal squared. Due to stress, I got the right part of my face temporarily paralyzed an hour ago, I am so glad that it slowly melts, hurts a bit, but I am optimistic that I'll get back in control of it in a day or two. Two days ago, my nose started bleeding with headaches. So yes, I know well what you are talking about. We have no choice, but to believe in a better future, in survival, however pointless thatight seem, giving up is simply not an option. I wish you the best of luck, brother.
I've been wondering how you've been Levi! Much of what you shared for your 2024 resonates for me, and it's still going. I'm tired, and I'm burnout. Yet, I keep pushing and punishing myself, getting no where good (or so it feels). A lot of stuff sucks, but a lot of stuff is good, and might become good soon. I'm hopeful for the future too. Good to hear from you.
PS. Just opened your Burnout note. I've been talking about David Graeber's Bullshit Jobs lately to so many people! I kinda feel like Burnout is like the ego being like "screw this, I'm done".
Levi - I can relate to so much of your post. As we learn to recognize our hyper-independence, it's hard. To be vulnerable, and connect with others is such a huge step.... I've been extremely challenged in asking for help or even recognizing how I'm doing. You're in my thoughts and I hope you'll be able to meet your goals for housing somewhere that can add to your healing, not make it harder. This part so hard.
Thank you, Lauren! It is such a challenge living in a culture of I've-got-my-shit-togetherism when the reality is most people are isolated and struggling. Just trying to drop some more of that, a few bits at a time.
Hang on there. I can relate. I am actually diagnosed autistic myself and my current place is literally painfully killing me, has been doing that for a number of years... The environment for autistic people here in Toronto is brutal, finding a reasonable place and surviving is increasingly harder and harder, all public parks around are just overcrowded tent cities for the homeless now, as the housing crisis is brutal squared. Due to stress, I got the right part of my face temporarily paralyzed an hour ago, I am so glad that it slowly melts, hurts a bit, but I am optimistic that I'll get back in control of it in a day or two. Two days ago, my nose started bleeding with headaches. So yes, I know well what you are talking about. We have no choice, but to believe in a better future, in survival, however pointless thatight seem, giving up is simply not an option. I wish you the best of luck, brother.
Thank you youlian! And again for sharing some of your story here.
I'm not feeling hopeless or anything, I believe in the future :)
I hope you're feeling better today.